Woke up at about 7:30am this morning to my cell phone alarm.  I was NOT ready to wake up.  I was surprised how well I slept in Satan’s Dorm.  No matter it was time to HEAD NORTH.  It was over cast and spotting rain like a Middle School girl starting her “ladies days.”  Just completely random. (note to self, get new windshield wipers)

I fired up my crappy wi-fi and started to look for the places Sarah told me about.  I got the addresses for the bank (needed cash in wallet), coffee shop that Sarah mentioned to me, and Los Bagels (another Sarah place).  I totally got lost like Helen Keller trying to read a stucko ceiling (oops to far), looking for the coffee place so I scraped it.  Streets and Trips and DanEEE really saved my ass.  I was totally turned around, but found my way out.  I did find Los Bagels however and had the Sea Food Deliah bagel sandwhich.  I have resolved to have as much SeaFood as possible on this trip since I’m on the coast.  The odds of it being fresh are in my favor here and I like that.

Gas’d up, caffine’d up, poo’d up, and shut’d up.  I still haven’t seen any Ocean worth a damn at this point.  The fog was so thick you couldn’t see past about 50 feet.  As I drove up the 101 I kept seeing turn-offs for different beachs and vista points.  I finally gave in and went to Patricks Point where I took some of my first pictures (see the side  bar at the top for photos).

After that I started driving through crazy winding cliff roads and small coastal villages.  Did you know that the Red Woods of Northern California is the number one exporter of Chainsaw carved bears out of random wood? Yea, true story Internet I saw it with my own eyes.

I then saw a sign for The Trees of Mystery.  Now I didn’t go on many vacations when I was kid, but the ones I did go on were memorable.  I know my family is reading this so there you  go :-P.  One trip we did take was here in the Red Woods area and we went to the trees of Mystery so I had to stop here and reminisce.  It was just like I remembered, the depressed Indian guy on a horse made of wood, seriously why are all Native Americans sad? Its not like we… (oops yes we did). Movin’ on…

Paul B. was there with the guy inside talking to people as they walked by.  Cat calling at senior citizens and offering promises of candy to any little kids who came around to the back of the boot and knocked three times.  Babe the big Blue Ox was there and so was Babe’s Packaged which I will sum up in this hymn:


Babe oh babe, Ox of Blue.

Your legend is known through-out the land.

There are no words for what you have been through,

Paul has always been there, to pat you with his hand.

It seems you have been diagnosed with a horrid condition,

Deeper it puts you into your ruts.

Babe, just learn to be happy with your affliction.

You have huge freakin’ nuts.

Title: Your My Boy Blue … By: Danny Machal

I decided to push on through and get to Coos Bay where I intended to stop and rest for the day.  I got hungry around 2:30 or so and decided to stop at the first insane hole in the wall I saw.  The Crazy Norwegians Fish and Chips in Port Orford delivered.  I had the fish and chips even though they offered more things.  I figured it was this Crazy Guys specialty since its on the sign.  They were pretty damn good I must say.  When I went to pay I think I got a look at the man himself.  Dirty apron, scragily facial hair, white headphones connected to an old school Sony WALKMAN! There was no mistake, it was him.  I was pleased and stopped at the Port to suck down some coffee and take pictures of the Ocean when the sun was out.  (see photo gallery).

Got to Coos Bay and cruised around for wi-fi or a visitors center so I could figure out where I’m sleeping.  Thankfully down town Coos Bay is blanketed in a city sponsored wifi hot spot so … awesome.  I didn’t want a Motel 6 so I called the Edgewater and reserved a room.  (pics in gallery).  Whenever I get into a hotel room the first thing I do is strip down.  I don’t know why but its how I mark the territory.  “I can be naked in here! THIS IS MY AREA!”… something like that goes through my head.

Took a shower went to Hitler’s Kitchen the Blue Heron and got to some of my German roots.  Good food and good beer, I was stuffed.  Grabbed a bottle of Oregon Native wine, Stone Wolf Vineyards Pinot Noir.  It’s okay, not that impressive.  Maybe if I wasn’t drinking it out of my complimentary coffee mug set, I might like it better.
Sorry if there are any errors I’m beat and I need to get this wine gone so I can sleep like a baby.

Good Night Internet.

ps. Photo Gallery on the top if you are blind.

pps. Astoria tomorrow!!!! Can we say, “HEYYYYYYYY YOUUUUUUUUUU GUYYYYYYYYYYYYYYS!”

ppps.  The comments have been great 🙂

October 18th, 2008

Posted In: Personal, zEverything